Motherhood Essay: What My Mother Did Not Tell Me!

By Alanda G
Cocoa Mommy

Motherhood has opened up a plethora of emotions in my life. In order to explore the facets of motherhood I must reflect on the birth of my first child. You read how your life changes after becoming a mom, but who knew by what degree. Shortly after getting married I decided that my biological clock was buzzing really loud and I wanted to get pregnant right away. My biological clock was definitely in tune because four months later I was expecting. When I first received the news I went in search of pregnancy books and magazines to get the the most up to date information on “what to expect”. The first challenge of my impending step into motherhood was how to balance a full-time job and still manage to bask in the glow of pregnancy. I felt like my emotions were on a constant roller coaster.

After consulting with my mother on her births, I elected to plan my “au naturel” birth plan. My mother of course thought I had some screws loose but nonetheless supported my intentions. I was really blessed in terms of my pregnancy because it was very uneventful expect for the occasional nausea from taking pre-natal vitamins. The morning my water broke I knew there was no turning back and the day had finally arrived to meet my little bundle of joy. The doctor on call was confident we would meet twelve hours later since this was my first birth. When I arrived at the hospital I felt like queen for a day because all eyes were on me. After the nurse checked to see if I was really dilated I started to prepare my strategy for an “au naturel” birth. I challenged myself to engage in as much physical activity as my body would allow before the delivery. I started to do squats, walk and took a shower. All of these things kept me relatively calm as my labor started to intensify. When my body reached its threshold of exhaustion I resorted to the hospital bed. My planning obviously worked because I was dilated enough to have the doctor leave his home four hours later after my initial call. When he arrived it was time to meet my little bundle who was a surprise because I declined to find out the sex. As I was on the bed with my feet in stir ups I remember the doctor asking if the resident could assist. I really wanted to ask under the circumstances, does it really matter? I wanted to meet my new bundle of joy and find out the true meaning of the “ring of fire” .

In all my discussions with mothers prior to giving birth I was constantly asked why would you even consider having a drug free birth. For me it was my personal choice to experience the process naturally and to allow my body to take me through the entire process. It was an amazing experience after my baby boy was laid on my chest. The rush of emotion that I felt when it was over was beyond words. I was able to cuddle with my baby and nourish him shortly after our birthing journey. It definitely gave me a new appreciation for motherhood. I felt so blessed as a mother because I now shared such a personal connection with my mother. After my delivery, I had no recall of pain. Whenever someone asks me about the experience I say it was uncomfortable and not painful.

I sometimes wrestle with whether I am doing a good job as a mother especially when I crave just a moment to use the bathroom without interruptions, take a relaxing bath/shower, enjoy a good book or CD in peace or sit down for some juicy gossip with the girls. As the mom of two healthy and beautiful kids, motherhood has definitely taught me the value of patience and understanding as well as the true meaning of unconditional love. Motherhood has its daily challenges but when I reflect on the journey; it was well worth every hour, minute and second of labor(or being uncomfortable as I call it).

Visit Ananda at www.cocoa-mommy.blogspot.com